Its been a long while since my last post. Had been travelling quite a bit. To London and Scotland between Nov. end and first week of Dec. Had a great time - visiting Europe for first time. Was in Jaipur, India a week ago.
My head is filled with too many impresssions. Need to settle down a bit before starting to write about my experiences.

JOSE RIZAL, Philippine national hero. Most meaningful poem ever.

"Mi último adiós" (Spanish for "My Last Farewell") is a poem written by Philippine national hero José Rizal on the eve of his execution on December 30, 1896. Although the poem was untitled, this title served as an artifice useful as a quick reference. This poem was one of the last notes he wrote before his execution. Another that he had written before his death was found in his shoe but because the text could not be read it remains a mystery.
NO HOLDS BARREDRaja Petra Kamarudin

Mi último adiós
Farewell, dear Fatherland, clime of the sun caress'dPearl of the Orient seas, our Eden lost!,Gladly now I go to give thee this faded life's best,And were it brighter, fresher, or more blestStill would I give it thee, nor count the cost.
On the field of battle, 'mid the frenzy of fight, Others have given their lives, without doubt or heed; The place matters not-cypress or laurel or lily white,Scaffold or open plain, combat or martyrdom's plight,T is ever the same, to serve our home and country's need.
I die just when I see the dawn break, Through the gloom of night, to herald the day; And if color is lacking my blood thou shalt take,Pour'd out at need for thy dear sake To dye with its crimson the waking ray.
My dreams, when life first opened to me, My dreams, when the hopes of youth beat high, Were to see thy lov'd face, O gem of the Orient sea From gloom and grief, from care and sorrow free; No blush on thy brow, no tear in thine eye.
Dream of my life, my living and burning desire, All hail ! cries the soul that is now to take flight; All hail ! And sweet it is for thee to expire ; To die for thy sake, that thou mayst aspire;And sleep in thy bosom eternity's long night.
If over my grave some day thou seest grow, In the grassy sod, a humble flower, Draw it to thy lips and kiss my soul so,While I may feel on my brow in the cold tomb below The touch of thy tenderness, thy breath's warm power.
Let the moon beam over me soft and serene, Let the dawn shed over me its radiant flashes, Let the wind with sad lament over me keen ; And if on my cross a bird should be seen, Let it trill there its hymn of peace to my ashes.
Let the sun draw the vapors up to the sky,And heavenward in purity bear my tardy protestLet some kind soul o 'er my untimely fate sigh,And in the still evening a prayer be lifted on highFrom thee, 0 my country, that in God I may rest.
Pray for all those that hapless have died,For all who have suffered the unmeasur'd pain;For our mothers that bitterly their woes have cried,For widows and orphans, for captives by torture triedAnd then for thyself that redemption thou mayst gain.
And when the dark night wraps the graveyard aroundWith only the dead in their vigil to seeBreak not my repose or the mystery profoundAnd perchance thou mayst hear a sad hymn resound'T is I, O my country, raising a song unto thee.
And even my grave is remembered no moreUnmark'd by never a cross nor a stoneLet the plow sweep through it, the spade turn it o'erThat my ashes may carpet earthly floor,Before into nothingness at last they are blown.
Then will oblivion bring to me no care As over thy vales and plains I sweep;Throbbing and cleansed in thy space and air With color and light, with song and lament I fare, Ever repeating the faith that I keep.
My Fatherland ador'd, that sadness to my sorrow lendsBeloved Filipinas, hear now my last good-by! I give thee all: parents and kindred and friendsFor I go where no slave before the oppressor bends,Where faith can never kill, and God reigns e'er on high!
Farewell to you all, from my soul torn away,Friends of my childhood in the home dispossessed !Give thanks that I rest from the wearisome day !Farewell to thee, too, sweet friend that lightened my way;Beloved creatures all, farewell! In death there is rest !
Translated by Charles Derbyshire

This is how a poem should be. The urgency of the Jose Rizal's message to his people, so precise yet brief. The clarity of his message is truly amazing. Appropriately the poem reads as the last ebb of the patriot's life.

Racing forward near the finishing line

When everything is in place, does uninterrupted action follow? Well that is everyone's desire and should be the goal for us to strive on.

doodling

We doodle when bored or sink into the realm of imagination. I am now doodling not with lines and curve but with words. Maybe this is a good way to flex your imagination as writing helps to order and track the mental flow thus preventing it from wandering aimlessly especially down the dark tunnel of sense gratification. Once our imagination finds its way to this dark tunnel it becomes addicted and would given the next chance intinctively head towards that destination thus depriving us of freely expanding our imagination.

Twas just a doodle.

What to do?

There are always many things to do on everyday of one's life. However starting a specific work is an uphill struggle most of the time. How I wish I could just put pen to paper or fingers to the keyboard and let the floodgate of ideas open. Actually everytime I try this method it works perfectly but my mind refuses to accept this fact and is forever discouraging me from doing it. It is thus that I have many unwritten or uncompleted works.

Fed up with sensual habits

Sense gratification is a disease that is afflicting every human being. Continuing to satiate the senses : tongue, eyes, ears, nose and skin, we fall deeper and deeper into the dark tunnel of affection and anxiety.

What is it that makes my writings exciting and enthralling to me one day and boring and lacking as I read it on another day. The positive days increase my enthusiasm to continue with my writings while the negative phase undermines my self confidence and makes me shun away from my works. On a balanced note, I admit that my works have the potential to turn me into an internationally renowned artist, however this state of mind cannot be sustained for too long. Now I am back on the positive mood and I hope this time around I will manage to get some work done and thus motivate me to change my mind's focus to become geared towards my writing career. If I can keep this momentum for at least a few months then I can climb back into the saddle and continue my ride for a much longer if not permanently.